By

Andrew DeMarco

 

Last week I was watching the ceremonies dedicating the 9-11 Museum at the World Trade Center and all the speakers, in my opinion, did an excellent job; Governor Cuomo, Governor Christie, President Obama and former Mayor Bloomberg short, sweet and poignant. There was no partisanship, no politics, none of the usual nonsense that gets in the way of progress; it was just the way it should be for such a ceremony. After the ceremony, I went to do some chores and after parking my car and getting a quarter for the meter, there it was clear as day “E Pluribus Unum.” This got me thinking, which some would say is dangerous, about that simple Latin phrase.

For those of you not familiar with this motto here is a brief run down. E Pluribus Unum is Latin for “out of many, one.” Sometimes it is translated more loosely as “one from many.” It is found on the Great Seal of the United States, and most U.S. coinage and some currency. This refers to the fact that the United States was formed as a cohesive single nation as the result of the thirteen small colonies joining together. More recently its meaning has come to suggest that out of many peoples, races, religions, languages and ancestries has emerged a single people and nation, illustrating the concept of the melting pot.

E Pluribus Unum, why is it that it seems the only time we really become one is either in times of crisis and occasionally times of elation? Think about it for a moment, from the early 19^th century on times of crisis that were turned into battle cries. Remember the Alamo, Remember the Maine, Remember Pearl Harbor and Remember 9-11 were all born out of difficult times and all brought us together, out of many one. I remember asking my parents where they were on Pearl Harbor Day and both could describe vividly where they were and what they were doing. They also remembered where they were on V-E and V-J Day and how everyone just came together with tears of joy.

The same is true with me and September 11^th.  I remember where I was and how my town had come together. They began collecting anything which might be needed by rescuers and hopefully survivors. This scene was repeated in countless towns all across the country. I also recall blood drives all around the country hopefully for the injured which was another example of the melting pot coming together.

The opposite is also true; one just has to remember the famous “kiss” photo and the mobs in Times Square on V-J Day or the night that it was announced that Osama Bin Laden had been killed and the scenes of celebration in front of the White House. Who can forget the 1980 Winter Olympics in Lake Placid and the Miracle on Ice, when a group of college kids, during the height of the cold war, brought together a nation by beating the Russians and eventually winning the gold medal in hockey?

So the question I have is this: Why is it that it seems we only come together in good times or bad or are we really E Pluribus Unum at all times and it just seems to be more noticeable during the good and bad times and why does it seem only during those times?

Some might say that the divisiveness of politics today and the constant bickering between parties gives the appearance that we are no longer that one from many and not many could argue with that reasoning. Maybe if our politicians instead of fighting amongst themselves realized that we are all in this together and we are truly one out of many, it might rub off on the rest of us and bring us together all of the time not just during the good or bad.

So with the dedication of the 9-11 Memorial Museum behind us and Memorial Day just around the corner let’s remember all those from the melting pot that gave their all to make this country great. And let’s also remember that when we stand as one there is nothing that we as a nation cannot do, and history has proven that. So I would like to wish everyone a safe and Happy Memorial Day, and remind you that the next time you see the Great Seal or look at a quarter think of that simple phrase E Pluribus Unum. Let it fill you with a sense of pride and think of truly becoming that melting pot and becoming one at all times not just good or bad, no matter your race, creed or color and may it give you that feeling that Cousin Bob would call that ……Rosy Glow.

 

 

 

By

Andrew DeMarco

 

Some time ago when I was working in White Plains I commuted daily by car and pretty much took the same route every day. After a few months of this commute I noticed an older gentleman who would be walking his dog on the same route every morning. What really got my attention at that time was that he was with his companion in all types of weather, rain, sleet, snow, heat or the freezing cold he was out there walking his dog and always with a smile on his face.

After seeing this gentleman for about a year, one day I decided to pull over and talk to him, so I did. I introduced myself and told him how for about a year now I have seen him almost every day, that I was not a stalker but was curious that no matter what the weather he was always smiling and waving to everyone. He introduced himself as James and his dog was Buddy. He then explained that any day he was out walking with Buddy was a good day. It did not matter if it was hot or cold, rainy or fair, what mattered was he was up and about and out with Buddy. We finished our brief conversation and I went on my way.

This initial meeting got me thinking about the wonderful attitude that James had. His take on life was one that we all should have, basically enjoy each day. So from then on when I was on my way to work I kept an eye out for James and Buddy. My thinking was that no matter how I felt about going to work that day, saying good morning to James would improve my day and make my job fun.

Over the years I would stop when I could to chat with James and Buddy and when I could not, because I was in a hurry I would blow the horn and he would respond. I remember once when I got a new car and I blew the horn, James automatically waved, but had no idea that it was me. The next time I stopped to chat with him he realized I had a “new ride” and told me he would keep an eye out for me the next day.

James and Buddy would become “regulars” on my morning commute and when I did run into them they would truly get my day started on the right foot. When I had the time to stop James always would be leaning into the window and Buddy would have his front paws up also looking in to hear what James had to say. James always  had a story about things going on at home and  one thing or another and he always ended his story with a what I would call a rosy glow.  

There was about a month or so when I did not see James and Buddy and then one day I saw them on their usually route. I pulled over as usual and found out that James had had some health problems which side lined him for a time but he was better and back in to his usual routine, and the smile as always was on his face. I realized that during that stretch when I did not see them I was arriving at work in a different frame of mind. 

About 4 years ago I got a new job and no longer worked in White Plains, so I did not see James and Buddy regularly. I did see them from time to time and James still had that smile and spring in his step, but Buddy was slowing down and James was worried. Then the one day I saw James on his usually walk without his Buddy and I had to pull over immediately. The inevitable happened, Buddy passed away, but that did not slow James down. He said that what kept him young was his walk with Buddy and although Buddy was no longer with him, that would not stop him from his daily walk. Sure enough he is out there rain or shine, hot or cold with that old spring in his step, and as always that smile.

For a time he was considering getting another dog to replace Buddy, but after thinking about it for some time he realized that at his age it would not be practical and no dog could replace Buddy. He joked that now he would have to rely on his wife to keep him company on his walks but she refused to use the leash. 

I always look out for James and whenever I can I will always stop and chat with him. I think that had I not stopped that day a few years earlier, I would never have made a friend.  The wisdom of his years and stories were and still are a learning experience for me and just that smile and attitude about life always fills me with that feeling that Cousin Bob would call that ….Rosy Glow.

 

 

 

 

 

By

Bob LaTorre

 

Here is another column written by Cousin Bob over 25 years ago. With Easter being a time of renewal it might be a good time to take inventory.

 

The question “What is Wealth?” has been debated for thousands of years. Most people still tend to think that wealth has something to do with money. Consider the problem of one Donald Trump. Starting with a few million dollars of inheritance, in just a few years he amassed a fortune estimated to be in the neighborhood of a billion dollars. Now that sounds like real wealth to me….or is it?

Even more recently, it appears that Mr. Trump may be in the process of losing it all. If indeed there is such a wealth, how is it possible to lose it so easily? One would think that if wealth is defined in monetary terms, it could not disappear once acquired.

Perhaps then, wealth is not money at all. Maybe it is something else. I have very little money and few possessions, but I have always considered myself a wealthy man. In fact, most of the few valuables we once owned were stolen a few years ago and, while it upset me a great deal, I never considered myself less wealthy after the robbery. No, my wealth could not be stolen.

If not money and expensive things, what then, is wealth? Let me list for you a few of my more valuable possessions. Good health. While money may help pay for medical care, not having the need for such care is even more valuable. Ask any sick man with a lot of money what he would give to have good health; the usual answer is, “any amount of money.” That lesson was taught to me years ago by a man with more money than anyone I known before or since.

The next item on my balance sheet would be the love and affection of my wife. No amount of money could ever buy that. I need no better example to prove that than Mr. Trump himself. It seems that with all his money he could not buy the love or loyalty of either of the two women in his life. Those are items that are precious beyond all the gold in the world and history has demonstrated that lesson more than any other.

Next item: the love of my children. To some extent I had to work hard to win that love. It was my behavior that enabled them to love me and on the other hand it is something which they give to me of their own free will. In their minds, I may not always be right but, I am always “Dad.”

Among the other items in my safe deposit box would be the few talents given to me at birth. The ability to communicate with some degree of clarity, in both the written and spoken word. That includes my ability to teach, which I do well and enjoy doing.

The friends and acquaintances I have made in my life, rank high in value to me. It is through them that I gained so much knowledge about the world. I guess I would have to include some of the people I have disliked. Though few in number, the people I disliked taught me a great deal on how not to behave.

The list of my valuable possessions goes on and on. The thing that is most important about this list is that none of them can ever be stolen, repossessed, or foreclosed upon. They are all mine, and in truth no one can take them. That is why they are so valuable.

Oh! There is one other thing that should not be left off this list. I don’t know what to call it but it is something deep within me that gives me the ability to greet each day with a special feeling which I have come to call …… a Rosy Glow.

 

 

By

Andrew DeMarco

 

“There are only two seasons winter and baseball.” – Bill Veek

With opening day behind us and a new season under way, hope springs eternal for the 30 major league teams. The hope being that World Series Championship, okay maybe 29 teams I forgot about the Cubs. A new baseball season is a sure sign of Spring which after this winter is much needed. Besides a change of the seasons a new baseball season always brings change which is inevitable. For instance,one change is that the Boston Red Sox are the World Series Champions and have won more World Series in this Century than their rival the New York Yankees. (Talk about the universe being turned upside down.) It should be noted however that the last century started out the same way and we all know how the 20^th century ended. Change is inevitable! Well maybe for every team except the Cubs.

But one really big change that will take place this year is the use of instant replay in baseball. This too seemed inevitable since it is already used to varying degrees in football, basketball, and hockey. Now I don’t know where you stand on this but I am not a fan of instant replay in any sport, even if it could benefit my team and I will tell you why and use baseball as my example. Baseball as true for the other sports is a game played by human beings and human beings make mistakes. This is not a game of pinball or a game played on an X-box, it is played on a field by humans and to err is human. During a game, a fielder can make an error and a coach can send a runner when he shouldn’t and that is a mistake. Even the manager makes mistakes. For instance, he may bring the infield in and that backfires or he may make a decision to walk a batter and that batter hits one out of the park. They may not seem like mistakes but they are since basically any error in judgment is a mistake. So if players, coaches and managers can make errors and mistakes why can’t an umpire? If an infielder boots one does he get a do-over? I don’t think so, but basically the umpire is getting a do-over.

Future change and inevitability is the retirement of Derek Jeter after this season. This gives Yankee fans a whole season to get ready for that big change and Derek’s retirement was inevitable, although I am sure there were some Yankee fans who expected to see Derek playing shortstop with a walker. His retirement tour will soften the blow of the change, until next spring training when all the talk will be about life without Derek. One other change that will occur after his retirement is that we will not hear as much mention of the Core Four (Jeter, Posada, Pettitte and Rivera). That is unless the Steinbrenner’s decide to build a Mount Rushmore like monument to them on a mountain top in the Catskills, probably in the Cooperstown area. Maybe they can call it “Mount Corefour” and find a way to monetize it to pay for all their free agent acquisitions.

But there is one change that has crept in afew years ago and may have gone unnoticed by many. As far as I know it was not put in place by MLB and the Commissioner did not issue an edict demanding it. This change was not inevitable and was bought about by sportscasters, reporters and writers which to me is unnecessary and just plain annoying. It has to do with tradition, vocabulary, jargon, grammar, plurals and syntax whatever you want to call it and doesn’t affect the game, but again it is just an annoying and unnecessary change. You may ask what can get him so annoyed about baseball. Understand that it is not about baseball, but I am annoyed with those who claim they love the game, those who cover and report on it on a regular basis.

OK! I want to know when did RBIs become RBI? Have you noticed that when reporting or calling a game, announcers have now taken to saying, “he had a great game with 4 RBI.” Since I can remember, and I am sure even way before that, it was reported as 4 RBIs. I want to know who decided that this was wrong. What grammarian, announcer or reporter all of a sudden decided that we had to change this. Now we all know that it is Runs Batted In and if you really want to be correct let’s call it RsBI. How great would sound good! Jeter had a good game with 3 hits and 4 RsBI. Let’s face it things become established in the English language and they become the norm. For instance, when I was growing up ain’t was considered poor grammar, but now it is pretty much accepted. RBIs is still the accepted form according to the New York times Crossword. While doing my puzzle the other day the clue was Hank Aaron had 2,297 of these and the answer was RBIs. If it were RBI I could not have finished the puzzle.

Now that my rants are over and hope is springing eternal for all baseball fans, even Cubs fans and with the new season underway, we can all look forward to enjoying our National Pastime. There will be quiet evenings enjoying the games at home, those Saturday afternoons with friends at the local bar and that occasional trip to the ball park, all of which will give us all that feeling that Cousin Bob would call that……Rosy Glow.

 

 

 

By

Andrew DeMarco

 

“If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more you are a leader.”    John Quincy Adams

 While cleaning up my office files I came across an old article from the New York Times sports section from February 4, 2001. The article was entitled “The Little Point Guard Who Could” and the article was about my friends’ daughter Michele. At the time, Michele was a junior at the University of Richmond and told the story of how she was able to make it in Division 1 basketball with the handicap of being only 5 feet tall. The article tells her story from the time when she was a freshman in high school and was told she would never be able to play basketball let alone for a Division 1 team.

 In high school she was quite a good little athlete playing soccer, softball and tennis with softball being her real “natural” sport. When she was told she would not be able to compete, it only steeled her resolve to become a basketball player and really gave up softball to prove the naysayers wrong. Well she did and went on to become a two-time Westchester County player of the year. She went on to sign a letter of intent to play at the University of Richmond and by the time she graduated she was number 20 on the all-time NCAA career assist list and scored over 1,200 points. She still is the Richmond all-time assist leader and in the top 15 all time in scoring, and even played professionally in Greece for one year. So much for a handicap! It is interesting to note that Michele’s hero is appropriately Mighty Mouse.

 After graduating and playing in Greece for one year, basketball, which was never supposed to be her forte, was still in her blood and Michele was determined to become a coach. So she embarked on her career like most paying her dues as an assistant at Columbia, U Penn, Old Dominion and American U. Last April, Michele got the opportunity to become a head coach and accepted the position at Dartmouth College in Hanover, New Hampshire. Her last name is Koclanes so Coach K was out of the question and she now goes by Coach Belle.

 I have known Michele since she arrived home from the hospital with her parents over 30 years ago and although she has never let anything get in her way she has always shown herself to be a leader both on and off the court and an inspiration to many who she has come into contact with. I remember when she was in high school and later on when she was home from college, how the younger girls playing CYO would flock to her and how receptive she was to all of them.

This was further proven a few weekends ago when my wife and I decided to join Michele’s parents for a weekend trip to Hanover. It was the last weekend of the basketball season which would close out Michele’s first year as a head coach. It was a tough season for Michele and the team and we figured she could use some moral support.

After a tough final weekend and the emotion of Senior Day, we were invited to join her, the team and parents for the season ending awards luncheon. My wife and I were honored to be part of the Coaches family and enjoyed the awards and the program that Michele and her staff put together. But it was the honoring of the seniors that really told the story and hence my quote by John Quincy Adams at the beginning of this Glow.

During the ceremonies, Michele got up and thanked her team for their effort and for accepting her as their new coach. She realized how difficult it was for them, since she brought in a new system, new ways of doing things and since none of them were recruited by her it made it all the more difficult. Then it was the seniors turn to speak and that is when I realized that Michele was no longer Michele, but truly Coach Belle.

 Nicola Zimmer the team captain got up and thanked Coach Belle for all she had done and then the waterworks started. She looked at Coach Bell and told her through tears that she thought she knew everything about basketball, life and being a team captain and leader, but she was wrong. She went on to tell Coach Belle that she had learned more in the one year that Michele was coach than she had in her three previous years playing for Dartmouth. With that statement, I looked over at the Coach’s parents and saw the pride in their eyes and gave them a thumbs up. After the ceremonies, I spoke with the other players and what Nicola had stated was pretty much the consensus among all of them, especially to those players that were returning and really looking forward to next year.

 So I realized that it really isn’t about the number of wins, and that Coach Belle is living up to John Quincy’s thoughts about leadership. Coach Belle is proving that it is about being a leader and educating and building those leaders for tomorrow. I have no doubt that eventually Coach Belle will put together that winning team, because she has proven that she can inspire, lead and teach others to do more. Knowing this I know gives her parents and all those that know her and who will be playing for her in the future, that feeling that Cousin Bob would call that…… Rosy Glow.